Various - Elmopalooza!

Released: 1998

First Thoughts: Surprisingly, I don't really remember much beyond "Mambo I, I, I" (always my favorite) and "I Want a Monster to Be My Friend."

Purchase: I was six when this came out, you can't seriously expect me to remember where it came from. It was probably Target, though, as that's where I got most of my music at the time (and by "where I got" I mean "where my mom got" obviously). I'm 90% sure that's where I got the video. I had (have?) it on cassette, and just borrowed the CD from the library today to rip.

Playthrough:

Gloria Estefan - Mambo I, I, I - Still amazing, and genuinely one of Gloria's best songs. It ought to have been made longer, though. I love it for exposing me to Gloria, who I now adore.

En Vogue - I Want a Monster to Be My Friend - Probably the best production on the album, but I miss Zoe's "yeah yeah!" from the mix on the video. Great vocals, though, of course.

The Mighty Mighty Bosstones - The Zig Zag Dance - I actually like this more than I was expecting to. I think it was my least favorite as a child, but it has its charm. And the Count saying, "Now you know why they call them The Mighty Mighty Bosstones: count them, one mighty, two mighty, ah-ah!" has always been one of my favorite lines in the entire special.

Rosie O'Donnell - Nearly Missed - Rosie is obviously not a singer, though she actually has some pretty good vocal moments when she's in a higher register (this is true on her Christmas CDs as well, now that I think about it). But this is super catchy, even more than "Mambo I, I, I." It's just a shame that the soundtrack version is essentially a remix that inserts dialogue into the video version and has a slightly different backing track. A straight copy, extended with a new verse instead of awkwardly cut-up dialogue, would've been better.

The Fugees - Just Happy to Be Me - The chorus is nice enough, but the raps are awful to be honest. They could've done this very well if they'd kept the original structure and lyrics. "I'm in my PJ's drinking OJ" is just ridiculous.

Shawn Colvin - I Don't Want to Live on the Moon - This is surprisingly one of the standouts for me. I actually love her voice; I should check out some of her stuff. It probably helps that this is one of the very few songs on the album that are actually familiar and weren't just performed in one episode in the '70s or whatnot, but the arrangement is lovely too.

Steven Tyler - I Love Trash - I used to love this, and all I can say is that I'm glad I've grown the fuck up. It IS trash. Too bad.

Jimmy Buffett - Caribbean Amphibian - Not very remarkable, but perfectly #unjoyabul.

Céline Dion - Happy to Meet You - Nice enough, but pretty bland. But it's never been one of my favorite Street songs anyway.

Kenny Loggins - One Small Voice - One of the weaker tracks, but still better than Happy to Meet You (let alone I Love Trash). Again, just kind of bland.

Elmo and the Kids - Songs - Not a patch on the video version with Jon Stewart, David Alan Grier, and the adult Sesame Street cast. Typical Elmo fare.

Verdict: Could've done with a few donks on it, but it's pretty good, and remarkably diverse, for a children's album. Gloria, En Vogue, Shawn, and Kenny all have lovely voices, and for the most part it's very well produced. 8/10.

Standout: Mambo I, I, I and Nearly Missed.

A*Teens - The ABBA Generation

Released: 1999 (GOD I'M OLD)

First Thoughts: I loved this album long before I knew a thing about ABBA. Together with Mamma Mia! The Movie, it's to credit for my ABBA standom.

Purchase: Don't even know anymore. 2001 or 2002, I think.

Playthrough: Mamma Mia was almost always my favorite, and it's easy to see why. It's like a goddamn party in my head when I listen to this song. The only bad thing about it is that it's a shame that they reached their pinnacle with their very first single, but considering that their output afterward was still amazing, that's not that bad.

Gimme! Gimme! Gimme! is also great, though I think the radio mix is better. Certainly a worthy adaptation, and probably better than the original.

Super Trouper is still a jam. The original is one of my favorite ABBA songs, and I love this version as well. It took me years (and hearing the Meryl Streep version) to understand the line "The sight of you will prove to me I'm still alive," though - the most sense I could ever make out of Marie singing "I'm still alive" was "and Sir Lyden."

One of Us is probably the least convincing song on here. It just doesn't suit the dancey production as well as the others, and the retention of the intro makes it sound very odd since the rest of the song basically sounds like a HiNRG mix of an Erasure song. It's not bad or anything - not AT ALL - it's just an 8/10 on an album of 10/10's.

Voulez-Vous is really faithful to the original, but updated to match the standards of the time. It's probably the closest they got to perfectly mimicking "the music of ABBA today," to use their tagline from the Mamma Mia single.

SOS is really interesting, because it takes a midtempo and turns it into a huge dance track - and unlike One of Us, it works fantastically well.

Dancing Queen has never been one of my favorite ABBA songs, not because the song itself is bad, but there's something about the original that I just don't like - the vocals, the instrumentation, the production... I'm not sure. But I like almost every cover of it (and ABBA's own live version). This one, though, is my second-favorite, behind only Sixpence None the Richer's version (which is INCREDIBLE). The video was really fun too, even for a 10-year-old who had never heard of The Breakfast Club.

Take a Chance on Me is one of the two most clubby tracks on here, and it's probably a large part of why I'm so fond of dance music today (as is the album as a whole, to be honest). I love the original - maybe my favorite ABBA uptempo, maybe second behind Waterloo - but this is incredibly good.

Lay All Your Love on Me is the other, and again I think it exceeds the original, largely because I'm not fond of the vocals nor the disco production on the ABBA version.

The Name of the Game is another one where I don't like the original but love the covers, though in this case I can't even rank them (A*Teens, Irma, Amanda Seyfried) because they're all so great. The A*Teens version is chillingly beautiful and has some of the best vocal arrangements on the album.

Our Last Summer is a great album closer. Although they manage the impressive feat of mangling French worse than Girls Aloud on "Je ne parle pas français" ("Eh-full Tower" hurts my ears every time I hear it), it sounds so bright, and perfectly bittersweet. My favorite version of the song, for sure.

Knowing Me, Knowing You is the Japanese bonus track, but it really deserved to be on the standard album. It's my favorite ABBA song (at the moment), and though they don't match the original, they really do it justice. Marie's vocals on it are really nice.

Verdict: Still one of the best albums I own. I don't know why I don't play it every single week, but when I do remember it, I hammer it, and I think that's a good indication of how amazing it is. 10/10.

Standout: The whole goddamn album, let's be real.

Bananarama - Viva Bananarama

Released: 2009 (hard to believe it's almost five years old!)

First Thoughts: One of my two favorite albums by one of my favorite groups. I haven't listened to this in too long.

Purchase: From Amazon.com, more than a year after the release, and it was still pricey (around $17 after shipping, I think).

Playthrough: Love Comes is a monster. I remember bopping to it in the car, and it is still very bop-worthy.

Love Don't Live Here is also great. It's too bad they flopped so hard.

Rapture continues the streak. I don't know the original, but I sampled it on iTunes, and this blows it away.

I also love Seventeen. It has a slightly Gothic sound to it, I think.

Twisting is a let-down after those first four, but it's far from bad, just can't reach those heights.

Tell Me Tomorrow is the first real disappointment. There's a good song in there, but the production is all wrong, somehow.

The Runner returns them to the quality of the first few songs.

Extraordinary is a bit grating, but also very catchy. The "I need someone very extra-ordinary" hook would be great in a Kesha song.

Dum Dum Boy is right up there with Love Comes. Anthemic, driving - it sounds more like the Drama album than anything else here, but that's hardly a bad thing since Drama is one of my all-time favorite albums.

S-S-Single Bed is sort of kitschy, or at least campy, but I like it anyway.

We've Got the Night doesn't deserve to be the album closer. Second-worst thing here after Tell Me Tomorrow.

Verdict: With some distance, I can see that this really isn't as good as Drama, and probably not as good as Wow, but it is very good, definitely better than the majority of Bananaralbums. 9/10.

Standout: Love Comes (presented here in the somewhat superior radio mix - the Wideboys A-Mix is my favorite, though)